Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter what fork you use. ~Emily Post
Good manners often seem hard to come by in our stressed out, overworked society. We could all use some yoga now more than ever. With it’s promise for deep inner peace and abundant well-being, it is no wonder the ancient discipline continues to take off in the West. Yoga Journal reports that 14.3 million people in the United States practiced in 2010. With the growing numbers of attendees, occasional ruffled feathers seem inevitable. It is my hope that following these suggestions will help smooth them.
1. Quiet please.
It seems like a no-brainer that you’d turn off your cell phone before yoga class and that it’s a bad idea to make a loud entrance or exit. But new students who are conditioned by the hustle and bustle of daily life in America may not know. So, just like the little reminder at the movie theatre before the show begins, please turn off your cell phone and make as little noise as possible while you’re getting settled.
2. Tiptoe into class after centering if you show up late.
It is fine by me if you’re 10 minutes late for class. I would never wish for you to skip class because you’re running behind. I do think it would be much more polite if you waited until everyone’s done with their beginning meditation and be as quiet as a mouse as not to disturb the peace. Nuff said!
3. Practice respect by making eye contact with the teacher during his/her Dharma talk.
Eye contact is such a strong sign of respect. When the teacher is speaking about how the practice of yoga has changed their life or sharing some ancient philosophy teachings; offer your full, undivided attention. Even if you don’t like the way the teacher is presenting the material, do your best to keep focused. So instead of lying down or closing your eyes, be attentive. You just might learn something.
4. Do what the teacher is teaching. Please don’t add your own “flair.”
It’s disrespectful when you to do your own thing. We teachers put a lot of time and effort into creating our classes and we do it with great purpose. In the past year, I attended 4 workshops, 2 weekend intensives with master teachers, read at least 10 books on yoga and practiced regularly with my teachers. And, I know other instructors who have done way more than that! There is something beautiful about allowing yourself to be led and simply experiencing what the teacher has to offer. If there is a pose you feel you just can’t live without, do it after class instead.
5. It’s a “work-in!” Puh-leese don’t call it a workout.
When you lift weights, run, bike, take a group exercise class…. You work up a sweat and get a great workout. What a healthy part of your wellness routine! However, you could spend an entire lifetime learning about the practice of yoga (which is so much more than the physical postures) and still not know everything. Yoga is an ancient system for well-being where we learn to expand the conscious mind deep into the sub conscious mind, where we learn to live in harmony with nature and other people. It is a shift to your inner-most self and a way for you to see your true and divine nature. So, why don’t we call it a work-in? I like the sound of that.
6. If you’re bummed there’s a sub, keep your disappointment to yourself.
I totally get that you adore your regular teacher and you should. Just please don’t look at me and say “oh, you’re teaching?” when I’m subbing. That’s not so nice. If you’re taking a class with someone who is filling in for your regular instructor it is just another opportunity for you to learn how to adapt to change (which is the only constant in life anyway). Plus, think about how you’d feel if the tables were turned.
7. Don’t expect a teacher to work for free.
I am constantly asked to teach karma yoga classes and I’m more than happy to give the gift of yoga. In fact, I teach two regular free classes. Those participants enrich my life so much! Seems natural that ALL teachers would share the love in this way and we should. But please don’t be upset if you ask me to teach your church, temple or social group and I tell you how much I charge. If I said yes to every free-class-request I’d be in the poor house. A lot of us teachers make our living by helping to heal. You wouldn’t ask your doctor or dentist for a free office visit would you?
And, traditionally, yoga teachers would work out some type of trade with their students. The masters would teach them yoga and the students would do odd jobs, chores or cook meals in return for that instruction. So, there has always been an exchange of energy even back during ancient times.
8. Let’s not be rude now…
Please do your best to show compassion for all when you are in the sacred space where you practice yoga. Gossip and general rudeness just have no place in an environment where people are coming to reduce stress and learn about life’s deeper mysteries.
9. Bodily functions
Digestion happens. Especially when you’re in an intensive twisting class. If you feel like your fires are getting too stoked kindly and quietly exit the room to keep the air clear.
So, on that note… there are many things I didn’t cover, but as an observer of social behavior I don’t think anyone ever tries to be rude on purpose. So perhaps if we spot someone who is not “playing by the rules,” it’s best to give friendly reminders instead of dirty looks and to forgive if someone’s manners are not perfect.
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