It’s officially the holiday season and I can’t help but be a little disgusted at the cycle of acquiring more things.
Will a new gadget or wardrobe really make all the difference this year? I cannot even believe that after the last two or three very uncomfortable years, financially, there is still a great segment of my fellow Americans who seem to be itching to dive right back into the perpetual stream of commercialization of the precious winter holidays celebrated by persons of all faiths (and some of no faith at all.)
In trying to make room in my heart for those that drive me more than a little crazy and use these irritations as a good ole learning experience, I have come up with my own list of what it is that I most desire this holiday season. If you can’t beat em, join em…right?
I need more Time. Time to cook good food and to share it with people who are important to me. Time to read a few books that have nothing to do with history and offer an opportunity for my imagination to run amuck and even surprise me. Time to reflect and paint and listen to my breath even though the silence is filled with the maddening screams of the demons I have yet to fully face. Time to ride my bike for any reason other than shedding those extra pounds I have accumulated this year. Time for a personal practice at studios that I am not in charge of with teachers of talent and humility. Time to feel sorry for myself and Time to dance in a room full of strangers without a shred of self-consciousness. Time to have a more meaningful conversation with a few very important people to me and suss out some of the confusions of my life.
Touch. A hug, a kiss, a massage. Hands of others connected by arms and a loving intention to surround me and remind my fearful inner child that all is well with the world and that I am safe & loved. I need to be TOUCHED in a way that is full of intimacy and that gives us the opportunity to grow so very much closer.
I want Space. Wide open skies with tall trees that dance in the wind and share their deepest secrets with my soul. Miles of ocean that crashes onto the shore in a symphony of colors and textures waist high & warm. Mountains that peak beyond the clouds and the whispers of stardust from eons past.
Silence. I would love to slay the million worries that bubble up daily distracting me from the moment at hand. Silence the crying, the bombs, the pleas of those persecuted, the traffic, and the critics. Silence the political bickering, the divisions, the excuses, and the voices of the past. It is time for a Silence that is comfortable between us.
Some Clarity. A little spiritual Clarity would be great place to start. After that I would please like a few helpings of Clarity in all my relationships. Ambiguity is senseless and I am not a mind reader. For me & my part… I love you. I appreciate you. I need you. You are precious to me and there is nobody else like you in my life. I am looking forward to our future (which is not at all guaranteed nor the most interesting or important part) and I am very very focused on being closer here and now. We are sharing space my friends and I am all in! To the best of my abilities I will work at being open with you & my hope is that my needs don’t ever sound like nagging. In exchange I will take your answers & actions to heart and if we are not talking then in my mind I’m likely to hear that we have outgrown each other. Clarity means speaking the same language.
I crave Understanding. I am not always at my best and sometimes I don’t shower for days. I can be needy and selfish. I require a place in your heart that is reserved only for me and in return you can expect the same. Please Understand that I too am a work in progress and that I am fragile and have just as much to loose as you do. When it gets dark and I am scared I need a little Understanding.
I desire Grace. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. I call forth Grace to lead me through the uncomfortable periods of uncertainty with patience and emotional sobriety.
LOVE. more love. Brotherly Love. Love of a Parent. Love from friends and Love from a communicating and thoughtful Lover. The Love that comes from quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service, gifts & physical touch. Love that is unconditional and Love that is unexpected. Love of neighbor and Love of Self. Love that is patient and kind and rewarding and that grows and flowers with the seasons of life. What else is there than LOVE?
Box it, bottle it, wrap it and mail it. Better yet, swing on by and let’s exchange our gifts in person on the mat. Let us breath and move to the pulse of mother earth and let us empower, embrace, and ignite our hearts. These are the holiday gifts that mean the most and that will truly allow us to SHINE!!
What’s on your list?
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