“We each possess an inner resource of wisdom, resilience and strength…a place of deep peace, ease and great joy and light. When we are connected with that place, there isn’t self-doubt. We know from our core who we are and what to do. Being kind to yourself helps you get there.” –Kate Holcombe
There seems to be a lot of doubt floating around my head lately. There are things I want to do, but feel too held back sometimes in order to make them happen. In fact, if I had to choose, I think doubt would be my biggest obstacle to overcome right now. I am seeking a way to teach and write full-time and do more creative work than my nine-to-fiver affords, but I can’t seem to find my footing. There are pieces that I feel have yet to fall in place and it’s all I can do to be patient with the process.
Having made many great things happen for myself over the years, I consider myself to be a major manifester. I have tons of ideas, lots of know-how and experience, but the recent doubt keeps getting in the way. It’s almost as if I’m TOO practical to make this risky dream a reality. However, I know that this is where my path will lead and I’ve been using the five following tips to stay the course.
1) Be kind to myself. There’s no use beating myself up because I’m “not there yet” especially since “there” is such a subjective concept anyway. As an over-achieving, perfectionist, do-gooder type it’s been hard to swallow that things haven’t happened exactly as I want them to, but giving myself a break and learning from the process helps me stay present and aware, ready to take on opportunities as they come my way.
2) Balance patience with persistence. Patience has never been my greatest virtue and persistence has always been in my top three. The practice these days is knowing how to balance both, easing up on the persistence and determination without throwing in the towel, while ramping up my patience quota. Striking this balance enables me to move forward and appreciate the things that do seem to go my way, without getting frustrated.
3) “Practice and all is coming.” I love this quote by Sri K. Patthabi Jois and often refer to it in my classes and writing. So what if I’m not spending my days exactly as I pictured them, I mean let’s be honest, who really does? But if I continue to practice, my writing, my teaching, my yoga, then all is coming in good time.
4) Seek reassurance from within. Naturally, as the doubt level gets higher the insecurities creep up twice as fast. Instead of seeking council and acceptance from my peers, I’m better off putting that energy towards building the confidence I need to forge my path ahead. My sadhana has become much more personal as I focus on meditation, journaling and introspection to cultivate ideas and energies.
5) Have faith. I know deep down inside that what I’m trying to achieve is my life’s purpose. Some have it easier than others and I have to believe that all of the work I’m doing is for that greater purpose. That doesn’t mean its all rainbows and butterflies over here, but it does help to see that light at the end of the tunnel and put things in perspective.
I wake up every day battling the small me that feels comfortable in the doubt and insecurity. Heck, she’s grown up there and knows it very well. Now at 31 years of age, I’m tired of living in this shadow and the big me, or the Self, is working hard to overcome these obstacles. I have to believe that with a little patience, persistence, practice and faith all will come my way.
What dreams do you wish to achieve but are not quite sure how to get there? How do you stay focused on your goals? What parts of your yoga practice help you to stay patient with whatever process you are going through?
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